


Serpentine

by TheGreatCatsby



Category: Tokyo Ghoul
Genre: F/M, drabbles about nishiki whoot, expect angst
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-03-19
Updated: 2015-06-10
Packaged: 2018-03-18 15:07:07
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 7
Words: 2,163
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3574202
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheGreatCatsby/pseuds/TheGreatCatsby
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The first time Nishiki kills a human is after his sister dies.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Death

**Author's Note:**

> These are just gonna be drabbles centering around Nishiki. So yeah, enjoy!

The first human Nishiki kills is the man who turned in his sister. 

He doesn't even think about killing the investigators. 

He kills the man who gained his sister's trust only to take her life. That trust cost her everything, and it cost Nishiki the one person who ever cared about him. 

The man's blood spatters across his face, across his clothes, and the thud of his body hitting the floor should be satisfying but isn't. It won't bring her back. 

The blood dries on his face, makes his clothes stiff, and Nishiki takes a bite out of the man's arm because that's the best revenge he can think of. But as soon as he swallows, he's retching over the pavement, bringing up blood and bile and a sob. 

He's never killed a human before, but it becomes easier after that.


	2. Mask

“Do you have a mask?” 

Nishiki hasn't thought about it. Masks are for ghouls who go up against the investigators. Nishiki isn't that ghoul. 

“You should have one,” Yoshimura says. “Just in case.” 

Touka takes him to see Uta, whom Nishiki has never met. Uta stares at him with wide, black and red eyes. He doesn't even attempt to look human, and something about that bothers Nishiki. Perhaps because he's never been that comfortable in his own skin. 

As Uta takes his measurements he asks questions in his soft voice. “What do you do?” 

“I'm a student,” Nishiki says. 

“Of?” 

“Pharmacy.” 

Uta hums. “How interesting. Ghouls don't benefit from human medicine. Do you like humans?” 

Nishiki tenses. He feels Uta's cool hand on his shoulder, hears him murmur, “Relax.” 

“It's complicated,” he says, because he hates humans for what they've done to him, but then there's Kimi, and he loves her for what she's done to him. 

Uta hums again. “Why did you join Anteiku?” 

“They saved me from injuries caused by another ghoul.” He won't get into the specifics. It's a long story, and one he doesn't quite feel like sharing yet, because every time he thinks of Kimi tied up, he wants to punch something and cry at the same time. 

When he comes back a few days later, Uta presents him with a mask that looks like the head of a snake. It fits perfectly. 

“You seem like a man of contradictions,” Uta tells him. “People will find it hard to pin you down. Snakes are like that, hiding in the grass, waiting to make an unexpected attack.” 

“Only if they're threatened,” Nishiki says. 

Uta gives him a small smile. “Exactly.”


	3. Fight

Nishiki is well aware of his reputation. He's also aware of why he has it. 

He doesn't have a reputation for being tough. He has a reputation for being an asshole. 

It's fine by him, even if it means he can't rely on other ghouls. He's fine doing things on his own. If he depends on someone else, what is he going to do when they're gone? 

He isn't even on the CCG's radar, and that suits him fine. He uses his brain more than his body. The number of actual fights he's gotten into is extremely low compared to others. He never wanted to be a strong ghoul. He just does what's necessary for survival. 

Then Rize takes his territory and everything changes. 

She's a binge eater from another ward, a woman who looks cute and fights deadly, and he leaves that battle with several wounds that he has to hide from Kimi and Rize's voice in his ear purring, “Aww, don't be sad, Nishiki-kun. I'll share.” She'd said that with his blood staining her clothes. 

Needless to say, he didn't want to share. 

But Rize is out of his league, and it's too much to wage a war over territory, deal with being a student, and try to act normal for Kimi. It's bad enough that she notices his still-healing injuries sometimes, and he has to lie, saying they're from some sort of lab accident. It isn't convincing to him, it's probably not convincing to her, but Kimi lets it slide. 

So he waits, and takes food where he can get it. Rize is the type of person who will slip up. He knows it. 

Then she dies, and he finds the perfect opportunity to take back his territory. In wake of her death, there will be only weak ghouls moving in to scrape at whatever she's left behind. Ghouls that Nishiki can fight and win without having to crawl home in the middle of the night, blood soaking his clothes. He won't have to give Kimi an excuse for why he's too tired to sleep with her. He won't have to hide his pained expression behind smirks. 

So he makes his move.


	4. Instant

He'd told Kaneki that when things ended, it was always in an instant. 

He remembers how happy they were, how his sister had a boyfriend and a steady job, and Nishiki was accepted to Kamii. And then one night she didn't come home, and Nishiki found her bleeding on the street. He'd woken up thinking that they'd be alright, and when he went to sleep, he had nothing. 

The day before the Anteiku raid Kimi had walked with him to work. She'd held onto his arm and told him to cherish these moments together, and Nishiki had been outwardly resistant to the idea even as he secretly agreed with her. 

The next day he was saying goodbye, her tears were soaking into his sweater. His tears were hidden. 

He wants to have control. He wants to be able to say that tomorrow, next week, next month, next year, he'll be okay. But he can't. He knows he never will. 

So he embraces the unpredictability. After all, if he doesn't adapt, he'll die. He keeps on the move, tracks down ghouls, gains information. There are no humans in his life anymore. 

The brief moments of happiness pale in comparison to what he had with Kimi. He wonders about her, what she's doing, if she's found someone else. If she's happy. If she's safe. 

She is safe. That's what he's managed to convince himself. He left, and because of that, she's safe. It's his one certainty. 

Then Yomo tells him about a ghoul named Torso who targets women with scars. Kimi has the scar that Nishiki gave her. 

Because of him, Kimi isn't safe. 

And just like that, his last certainty is gone.


	5. Hate

Nishiki dislikes a lot of people, but he only actively hates one. 

Tsukiyama. 

Tsukiyama is probably the sort of person Nishiki wouldn't have ever liked even if he hadn't put Kimi in danger. 

But he had, and that's enough to make him an enemy for life. 

So it makes him more than a bit upset when he visits the new cafe and Yomo tells him, “I think you should visit Tsukiyama.” 

“What?!” He's not the only one who protests. Touka also looks horrified. 

“He's lost the thing that matters most to him,” Yomo says with a shrug. “I don't know if he has people.” 

“I don't care if he has people,” Nishiki says. 

“Nishiki--” 

“Do you not understand how hard it is for me to even look at him?” Nishiki snaps, just loudly enough for a few customers to turn around. He lowers his voice. “He tried to take away the one thing that I had.” 

Yomo wasn't there, but Touka was, and now she looks away. 

“I'm not the best person if you're looking for someone to care about him,” Nishiki adds. 

“Please,” Yomo says. 

Nishiki clenches his jaw, biting back an angry tirade. He owes Yomo and Touka. They built up :re from the ruins of Anteiku, and even though Nishiki doesn't work there, he's come to them for help countless times. He also helps them, but he has a feeling that what they offer is far more valuable than what he has to offer. 

“Fine,” he manages. “But if he ends up dead, don't blame me.” 

He walks out of the cafe before either of them can respond. 

He does find Tsukiyama, and finds out that he's being cared for by someone else. Someone a bit eccentric like him. Another person for Nishiki to hate. 

Nishiki doesn't actually talk to Tsukiyama. He leaves a can of coffee where he knows the guy taking care of him will see it, with a note saying, “Anteiku is worried. Don't die.” 

Maybe Yomo is right and Tsukiyama has changed. 

That doesn't change anything.


	6. Scars

Nishiki's face has changed in the past three years. Touka doesn't like to admit it, but when she looks at him, he seems sad. Sad and harsh. He's without glasses more often than not. A scar runs down his left eye, an angry mark that he won't talk about. 

He doesn't talk about a lot of things. He tells Touka and Yomo what's going on with the ghouls around the city but doesn't talk about himself. He doesn't talk about Kimi. He doesn't talk about why he's been looking for Torso. 

When he comes to Anteiku in the middle of the night, arms wrapped around his middle and barely standing, he doesn't tell them why. 

“You can't just come here like that and not say why,” Touka snaps as she and Yomo settle him in bed. He coughs up blood. She thinks, it's a miracle that he got to them at all. 

“Investigators,” Nishiki rasps. Yomo peels off his shirt and grabs bandages. 

“You need to eat,” he says. 

Touka grabs a cloth and gives it to Yomo because she feels awkward touching Nishiki. They've never even hugged before. 

Yomo begins cleaning the wounds, which are horribly deep and run straight through Nishiki's torso. Nishiki groans, his hands clenching at the bedsheets, and hisses, “That's gonna scar.” 

“What happened?” Touka asks. 

“I told you--” 

“You never say anything,” Touka cuts him off. “What are you doing? Are you trying to get yourself killed? Why are you killing other ghouls, anyway? What happened to your eye? Why did you come here with a hole in your stomach?” 

She's bordering on hysterical. She can't help it. She doesn't want to, but she cares about him, the stupid college boy she used to hate who stood with her when she wanted to help rescue Kaneki way back when. Who was willing to help her get into Kamii in his own strange way. 

One of the few people she knows who can understand what it's like to love a human. 

“Touka.” Nishiki swallows as Yomo forces him into a sitting position to wrap the bandages around his stomach. He looks too pale, and there are deep shadows under his eyes. It's miles away from the arrogant young man Touka is used to, the one who smirks in the face of, well, everything like it isn't a big deal. 

“What,” Touka demands. 

“You don't want to know.”


	7. Kagune

“Nishiki.” 

“Hmm?” 

“Can I see it?” 

Ah. There's no going back now. 

His kagune wraps around his leg and Kimi watches, eyes wide. 

“It's different than that girl's,” she says. 

“They all are.” 

He doesn't feel like a college student anymore. He isn't. With that thing wrapped around his leg and his eyes black streaked with blood red underneath his glasses, he's a monster. 

He avoids meeting her eyes for a moment, and then she says, “Nishiki” and he looks up. She's closer. “You still look like Nishiki.” 

“Do I?” He tilts his head. Her eyes travel down to his kagune. 

“It's a beautiful color,” she says, and then she runs her hand along its surface. 

Nishiki shivers, because kagune aren't things that are touched gently, so he's unused to the feeling. It's different than when someone touches his skin. It feels a little more removed, like when Kimi strokes his hair, but it still feels nice. Relaxing. 

Kagune are what makes a ghoul a predator, what kills, most of the time, and Kimi is touching it like it's part of her every day routine. 

It strikes Nishiki how brave she is. He doesn't tell her that, because he has his limits to how sappy he can be in one afternoon. 

Kimi looks up at his face, serious for a moment. Then she giggles. 

Nishiki's kagune disappears. “What?” he demands. 

“Nothing,” Kimi says, but the amusement is still there. “Just...your ghoul eyes and glasses look funny together. I didn't know ghouls needed glasses.” 

Nishiki touches his glasses, a bit self conscious. “I look damn good in these glasses,” he says. 

Kimi presses a small kiss to his lips. “Of course you do. Come on, let's finish studying.” She drags him to the couch. 

“You think I look silly,” Nishiki says. 

“No.” Kimi sits down and pats the space next to her. Nishiki sits and opens his notebook and he definitely doesn't sulk. 

Well, he sulks a little. Mostly because he likes teasing Kimi. Overwhelmingly, he's relieved. 

He'd rather she laugh at him than run away screaming.


End file.
